Category: Depression

I’ve been quiet for the past couple of months, and I am finally starting to feel better. I’ve been up and down for over six months as I tried to manage my depression myself, but it got to the point where I had to reach out to NHS Talking Therapy for help.

I can’t underestimate how good they have been and how responsive they were; they didn’t put me on a never-ending waiting list. Just the act of reaching out was the start of my recovery. I’ve only had a few sessions, but we’ve already identified trigger points and my behaviours. My counsellor also explained that cutting yourself from the rest of the world is perfectly normal. I have to admit that it is my main coping mechanism.

I’ve received some positive comments over the last few months, which I have not responded to. I always feel guilty for not responding, but during the dark days, I can’t, even though they are positive. I doubtless have lost a lot of goodwill from my readers over the years for my self-enforced silence.

It’s important we take away the stigma of mental illness, and when I feel up to it, I like to let you all know why I’ve been quiet. If I haven’t responded to any emails or comments, I hope you understand, but I appreciate you all and the support you give me.
I’ve also started writing again! I hope to deliver the conclusion of Ben’s story in France soon. I’ve also got loads of ideas floating around my head, and I need to write them down.

Thank you for all your support and patience.

I know I’ve been a little distant recently and unresponsive, so I’d like to thank all of you who have left comments, especially from new contributors. I’ve now read them and appreciate them. I love the ones where you tell me your experiences.

It has been a stressful few weeks lurching from one family issue to another, and I seem to be the one who helps and supports the others. But it has had a detrimental effect on my mental health, and I’ve been trying to hold things together. The sleepless nights are the worst; your mind runs rampant, and you are left feeling tired all day.

I’ve decided that now is the time to look after myself and give myself permission to be a little selfish. I’ve not written anything for several weeks and want to start writing again. I need to finish the story of Ben Masters and his camping trip in France, and I’m eager to start some new stories that have been swimming around my head.

It’s a bank holiday weekend, so I’m hoping the extra day off on Monday will help me recharge my batteries, and I’ll be posting the next instalment of Ben’s French adventure shortly.

Thank you all. You are the best, and I appreciate all your support.

I went through a year of lockdown and didn’t fall into a deep bout of depression. Now we are coming out of lockdown, it hits. I can’t blame it on anxiety, which I know some people are experiencing after such a long time being locked down. But I suppose that is the nature of this illness; there can be no rhyme or reason for when it strikes.

I was very conscious of my mental health during lockdown. I suppose because I knew there was a possibility of going into a depression during that difficult time, I made conscious decisions to try and stop it from happening. Now we are coming out, I have been more lax with my health, and I allowed this bout to overwhelm me.

So the lesson I have learnt this time is, don’t get cocky and complacent when you feel good; you need to keep working to keep depression at bay.

I have been a little quiet of late and not given you updates or new stories for several weeks.

About a month ago my depression returned. I thought it was just writer’s block but it was something else. My lust for life dissipated and my enthusiasm for writing stories waned, I was consumed with self-doubt.

The afternoons are getting dark and the Covid-19 precautions are exacerbating my problem with greater feelings of isolation. This pandemic is extremely serious and we have to take it seriously. The UK now has a vaccine but even though I have pre-existing conditions which make me vulnerable, I have learnt that I am only in the 6th category on the priority list. So I may not be vaccinated until May/June next year. I fear that not much is going to change in the first half of next year.

But we have to get there first and it will be a tough Christmas for many.

I’m clambering out of my depression and I have started writing again this week.  So I hope to have some updates soon.

In the meantime, please look after yourselves and look after those around you. If someone has gone quiet and is not responding, then send some friendly words without any expectations. Just say “Hi” and say you’ll be there if they need you.

Covid-19 has meant an increase in mental health issues, so let’s all support each other.

I may not always show it, but I really do appreciate all of you.