A Fatherly Talk
by David Heulfryn

 

“Max?” I asked, “Have you ever heard Mum and Dad have sex?”

Max seemed to choke on my question. “No!” He was emphatic, “And I don’t want to.”

“Oh,” I sighed, “Well, I heard them last night. You were asleep. I had woken up as Mum poked her head into our room. I heard her say to Dad that we were in the same bed again. She asked him if she should be worried, but he just said it was fine and asked if we were asleep.”

I told Max how Mum shut our door, and then they started to make noises in their bedroom. I couldn’t sleep because of all the noise they were making. Dad was grunting, and Mum was squealing, despite them trying not to. “It sounded like he was killing her.” I joked. “I put my fingers in my ears, but I could still hear them.”

“It’s only sex, Min. You taught me not to be ashamed of it, so why does it freak you out knowing Mum and Dad still do.”

“I just thought they were passed it. They’re in their forties.”

“I’m glad they’ve still got it in them,” Max said. “It means they’re not growing apart. I actually think Dad being away so much has made them want to do it more. Haven’t you noticed Dad giving Mum more attention at the weekends? They are more touchy-feely.”

“Well, I apologised to Mum this morning while you were in the shower. Dad was gone, and it was just her and me. She hugged me. I told her that you’ve been helping me. She said it was my hormones. She also asked me how often I slept in your bed.”

“Shit!” Max sighed. “I hope she is getting obsessed with us being in the same bed.”

“I think the fact that we’re naked makes her uncomfortable. But I told her I was upset last night, and you helped me. Mum said that this was the first time I’d sincerely apologised for having a tantrum. She kissed me on the cheek and said she loved me.”

“I get the feeling that things are changing around here,” Max said.

“I do too.” I agreed, and we heard the front door close. Dad was home. It was early for him. It had only just gone nine o’clock. He was certainly putting in very long days.

We could hear Mum and Dad talking but couldn’t decipher the words. We heard footsteps, and someone climbed the stairs. Our bedroom door opened, and Dad poked his head into our room.

“Hiya, Boys.” He sounded unsure. “Are you guys asleep yet?”

“No, Dad,” Max said.

“Do you mind if I come in and have a word?”

I wondered why he was tip-toeing around us. Normally he would just barge in.

“Sure, Dad,” I said.

He came in and turned on the light. Max and I squinted while our eyes adjusted. He came over to my bed and sat down.

“Do you boys still sleep naked?” He asked.

I grinned, “Yes. Have you ever tried it?”

“I did when I was younger. But I was older than you two. Your Gran would not have been happy if I slept naked at your age. Your Uncle Dave would have really taken the piss out of me as well. But when I went to university and finally had my own room, I started sleeping naked. It just seemed so much easier and saved me extra washing. Mind you, in those days, I would wear the same underpants for days on end.” He chuckled, “I never was any good at washing my clothes. When my pants got too funky, I wouldn’t wear any.” Dad was reminiscing about his youth. “Those were the days. I was a stinky student. Thanks to your Mum, I smell so fresh all the time. We met while we were in our third year. But she refused to do my washing. Instead, she withheld certain favours until I did my washing.”

“Dad!” I whined, knowing what favours he was alluding to.

“You’re growing up, Finn. Sex is going to be something you begin to get interested in. I know you say you’re gay. And I’m happy for you.” Dad patted my belly through the duvet. “And Max, you’re gay as well. Don’t think that I am ever disappointed at having two gay sons. I love you more now than I ever did when you were born. Max,” He looked over at my brother, “I see you are happy with your boyfriend. And he is a fine boy. I never did like that Jane much.” He winked at Max. “I can tell you have genuine feelings for him, and he you. I’m not going to pry into how far you have gone with James, no matter how much your Mum wants me to. And I don’t expect you to tell me. But I just want to make sure that you know what you’re doing.”

I couldn’t help but giggle. Max certainly knew what he was doing.

Dad looked at me, and I stopped laughing. He turned back to Max. “Sex education these days is still all about straight sex. I need to make sure you know the risks of gay sex and how to protect yourself.”

Max lifted himself and sat up. His duvet dropped from his chest into his lap.

“Dad,” Max began. “I know all about condoms and how to use them. I’ve even put one on.”

Dad looked shocked, and so did I.

“Those cucumbers need help to put on condoms.” Max grinned. “But I’m not ready yet. I’ve told Min this. He doesn’t want to see me forced into doing something I’m not ready for. And I won’t be. And James doesn’t pressure me. I’m happy with the way things are with me and James.

I saw Max blush, and I suspected he was getting hard under his duvet.

“And what about you, Finn?” Dad asked.

“I’m still a virgin, Dad.” I grinned at him.

“You’re only thirteen, so I’m glad to hear it.” He patted my leg. “But are you as well informed as your brother?”

“Yes, Dad.”

“Don’t be too eager to have sex.” Dad looked between us. “When the time comes, it should be special and with someone who means something special to you. Don’t do it just because your friends say they’re doing as they’re probably not. Don’t do it just to lose your virginity. There is nothing to be ashamed of in being a virgin.”

“When did you lose your virginity, Dad?” I asked.

“That’s a very personal question, Finn. It’s not something you should shout about. You must always respect the person and people you have sex with. Ask me when you’re older, and I might tell you.”

“What’s this about, Dad?” Max asked. “You’ve never really talked to us like this before. You’ve never talked about sex. To be honest, you’ve always seemed embarrassed when you bring it up.”

“I know, Max. And being away from you two for so long has made me realise that I’ve not really been there for you when I have been around. And besides, your mother is worried.”

“Is this about us sleeping in the same bed?” I shrugged. “We only do it when one of us is upset.”

“But isn’t it awkward with you both being naked?” Dad asked.

“Not at all.” I smiled. “Max and I have shared a room all our lives, well, my life.” I giggled, realising that Max couldn’t have shared a room with me before I was born. “We’ve seen each other naked so many times that we don’t care. We’ve come to realise that we shouldn’t be ashamed of our naked bodies. They are beautiful and natural.”

“I know, Finn. But not everyone might understand, and if others found out that you and your brother slept naked in the same bed, they might not understand and think that one or both of you might be being abused.”

“We’d never tell anyone,” I said.

“Not even James?” Dad raised his eyebrows at Max.

“James knows. But I trust him.” Max protested.

“And what if you split up. If you break up with James and he feels bad. He might want to hurt you like you hurt him by breaking up. He may tell people, and then what?”

“He’d never do that!” Max protested and looked like he was going to cry. “We love each other, Dad.”

“I know, Max. But things can change. My first love broke my heart. I wanted to hurt her back, and if I knew a secret which would cause her pain if it got out, I would have done it. I would have told people to hurt her. I’m wrong to think it, I know. But when you feel that pain, Max. You just want to lash out. It’s primaeval. It panders to the animal that’s inside us all.”

“I understand, Dad,” Max said. “We’ll be more careful.”

Dad started to laugh.

“Why are you laughing?” I asked.

“I’m just thinking about your Uncle Dave and me. We never would have dreamt of sleeping in the same bed, naked or not. We were never as close as you two are.” Dad chuckled. “I see my two boys and how brothers should be. I love you both so much, and I just wish I was here more often.”

“We understand, Dad. It’s your job.” Max said. “We’ll just have to make the best of what time we are together.”

“I hope it won’t be much longer. But the long days and the long commutes are getting me down. I miss the evenings with your Mum and the few seconds I see you two before you dash out of the house to see friends, boyfriends or sports clubs.”

“Sorry, Dad.” Max apologised.

“I’m only kidding. You boys have your lives. You don’t want to spend every evening with your old parents. Your Mum and I know that. But we miss you when you’re not around. When you have kids of your own, you may understand.”

“We’re gay, Dad.” I giggled, “We won’t be having kids.”

Dad ruffled my hair. “Finn, you may be gay, but it won’t stop you from having kids if you want them. There are always ways.”

“Really?” I smiled. The thought of having children hadn’t occurred to me.

“Of course, Finn. I’m hoping one of you will make me Grandad.” He looked at Max.

Max sighed, “I’m fourteen, and Min is thirteen. I think any talk about kids is a long way off. And I think Mum will be thankful for that.”

“Too true, Max.”

“If you’re really not okay with us sharing a bed, Dad, we’ll stop,” I suggested.

“Your Mum is worried. She knows you have a special bond. We’ve both seen it develop in the past year. We’ve spoken, and we both don’t care. Just please be discrete with what you tell others.”

“We will, Dad.” Max and I said in unison.

“I have to admit I’m jealous of you two. When you were younger, you would always fight, but I’ve never heard a cross word between you in the last nine months.”

“He’s still annoying, Dad.” Max joked.

“And he still snores.” I retorted.

“I do not!” Max sounded wounded.

“I like it.” I whispered to Dad, “It’s soothing listening to Max breath, knowing he’s there.”

Dad leaned forward and kissed my forehead. He got off my bed, went over to Max, and kissed him on the forehead. He stood by our door, his hand hovering by the light switch. “I love you both. And your Mum loves you both too.”

“We love you, Dad.” We spoke in unison.

Dad laughed, “you two even speak together. And I’ll let you into secret. I slept naked last night, and I’m going to sleep naked again tonight. I may be working hard, but it’s making me feel younger. If I don’t see you in the morning, have a good day at school. Night, Boys.” Dad switched off the light and gently closed our door.

Max took in a deep breath. “He’s changed. I wonder what’s got into him?” Max pondered.

“I thought it was nice. He didn’t treat us like kids. He’s never been so honest with us.”

“I know.”

“Max?” I asked. “If I promise not to tell anyone, can I sleep with you again tonight?”

I heard Max pull back his duvet. “I told you that you never need to ask.”

I joined Max in bed. Deep down, I knew I shouldn’t get too used to this. It couldn’t happen every night, and we wouldn’t share the same room at some point. But I was still only thirteen and needed to feel Max close to me for the moment. I needed to feel his skin against mine, his cock in the crack of my arse, his breath against my neck, and his arms around my chest.

“I love you, Max.”

“I love you, Min.”

The sound of his soft breaths soothed me to sleep. Max doesn’t snore.

 

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